We are Leila, Caitlin, Nicole, Veronica, Jocelyn and Sarah, and we need to talk.
Can we talk about the fact that the brand name of the belt-necessitating menstrual pads in Are You There God? It’s Me, Margaret is Teenage Softies? That’s really weird, right?
Reading Are You There God? It’s Me, Margaret? Can we talk about Leila being as Leila as possible?
Can we talk about how marshmallows have zero grams of fat and only 10 calories? How is that possible?
Can we talk about how I wish this celebrity couple would have made it?
Can we talk about how I temporarily forgot this blog but now I am NEWLY EXCITED?
Can we talk about how I need to blog here for real?
Let’s be for real here. I don’t speak Spanish, so I don’t understand this trailer for Venezuelan movie Taita Boves, but I DO understand that my beautiful and talented friend Veronica Osorio is in it and playing a nun and maybe has stigmata??? This had better be released in New York, is all I’m saying.
This seems like some deep shit.
Can we talk about how fantastic Veronica is? Also, how weird. She’s both of those things.
![Can We Talk About… Dental Hygiene?
I’ve been thinking about this for a while now and it’s time for me to say it already. People with poor to medium dental hygiene won’t get the girl/guy!!!! I am amazed I typed that because it seems like a very obvious statement, right? Not in my experience it isn’t, not for the person with said filthy mouth. It seems to me than most people don’t care or don’t notice their own teeth.
I’ve seen friends wonder why they can’t get a girl and whine about it I usually try to talk about the whole situation and understand it from context but the truth that I never say but always think is “IT’S NOT THAT SHE’S A CRAZY GIRL, DUDE!!! YOUR TEETH LOOK DIRTY! If I was her I would also NOT put my mouth in THAT OLD FOOD CRUMBS COCKTAIL OF YOUR MOUTH” (Here I vomit on the floor, pass out, the guy cries, friendship over, THE END). As a friend I’d love to tell you all of this in your face but it is embarrassing when someone call you out on your poor hygiene.
But seriously, guys, what’s happening?
Do you not see a slight whitish-looking type of layer on your teeth (AND GUMS)? If you don’t see it it might be there, so pass a finger [a clean finger for the love of your God] through a small area of your gum and tell me does the color change to a redder one after doing that? Yes? BRUSH THEN! GO, GO, GO!!!
Do you have a small white detachable thing between two teeth but you think people won’t notice? Brush it off, tooth pick it out, nail it down and out, tongue it in, DO SOMETHING! WE notice, if we are attracted to you we’re looking/staring/gazing SPECIFICALLY at your mouth with both our girly eyes, yes all eyes are girly.
It seems harsh and superficial, right? Why are we, human race, so superficial?
We are not, we don’t like putting our precious mouth and lips in a fusion of 2pm bread, alcohol, high-ph saliva and pieces of meat between the molars. I know don’t feel like eating second hand food and bacteria, I am not a bird, sorry.
V!
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PS: WHITE TONGUES???? SORRY BUT NO. Tongues are red and the white is filth. Deal breaker. Brush ‘em tongues I say, REALLY!](http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_l48r6ca55N1qc5rsso1_250.jpg)
I’ve been thinking about this for a while now and it’s time for me to say it already. People with poor to medium dental hygiene won’t get the girl/guy!!!! I am amazed I typed that because it seems like a very obvious statement, right? Not in my experience it isn’t, not for the person with said filthy mouth. It seems to me than most people don’t care or don’t notice their own teeth.
I’ve seen friends wonder why they can’t get a girl and whine about it I usually try to talk about the whole situation and understand it from context but the truth that I never say but always think is “IT’S NOT THAT SHE’S A CRAZY GIRL, DUDE!!! YOUR TEETH LOOK DIRTY! If I was her I would also NOT put my mouth in THAT OLD FOOD CRUMBS COCKTAIL OF YOUR MOUTH” (Here I vomit on the floor, pass out, the guy cries, friendship over, THE END). As a friend I’d love to tell you all of this in your face but it is embarrassing when someone call you out on your poor hygiene.
But seriously, guys, what’s happening?
Do you not see a slight whitish-looking type of layer on your teeth (AND GUMS)? If you don’t see it it might be there, so pass a finger [a clean finger for the love of your God] through a small area of your gum and tell me does the color change to a redder one after doing that? Yes? BRUSH THEN! GO, GO, GO!!!
Do you have a small white detachable thing between two teeth but you think people won’t notice? Brush it off, tooth pick it out, nail it down and out, tongue it in, DO SOMETHING! WE notice, if we are attracted to you we’re looking/staring/gazing SPECIFICALLY at your mouth with both our girly eyes, yes all eyes are girly.
We are not, we don’t like putting our precious mouth and lips in a fusion of 2pm bread, alcohol, high-ph saliva and pieces of meat between the molars. I know don’t feel like eating second hand food and bacteria, I am not a bird, sorry.
V!
—
PS: WHITE TONGUES???? SORRY BUT NO. Tongues are red and the white is filth. Deal breaker. Brush ‘em tongues I say, REALLY!
Can we talk about… how Sam Rockwell is an excellent actor?
I think I never paid real attention to him until The Assassination Of Jesse James but when I really knew something was up with this guy’s acting was when I saw him in Moon (he killed me) that’s when I knew actors can be great and big and subtle ALL OF IT at the same time! I was thankful that he was part of the cast on Iron Man 2, So many little details of his character and acting are just perfect.
And since we’re speaking of Iron Man 2: How great was the acting in it? PRETTY GREAT, natural and fun. Maybe not whiny “Pepper” (But that’s not Gwyneth fault is it?) but definitely from Don Cheadle (KUDOS), Mickey Rourke, Sam Rockwell and talk about Garry Shandling
Homework; Let’s think of roles we’d like to see Sam Rockwell doing. I think having him play a really depressed single dad of a 5 years old boy would be splendid. Anything that would both make him exasperated while trying to remain sweet at the same time, right?
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V!
Sad day. After 40 years of marriage, Al & Tipper Gore call it quits. This is the photo Yahoo! News first used when they posted the story and this is how I’ll remember them best.
Can we talk about how I’m genuinely saddened by this, even though I hate them both so much? It’s okay to hate Al Gore even though he was robbed of the presidency, guys.
Can we talk about Whatever It Takes? I am constitutionally incapable of distinguishing between this movie, Drive Me Crazy, and Get Over It!, but isn’t the above picture hilarious? Look at baby James Franco! What happened to Shane West? Why did Marla Sokoloff have to play the bad girl best friend on every show in the 90s?
